♥ Daddy - Laptop ♥
Bet all my fren shd noe.
Visited dad today as usual, casually mentioned to him that i would like to buy a laptop, n ask if he is willing to buy for mi.
He agreed to it steadily.
but condition is, i need to wait til he get his hard cash after selling his old flat at 559, n that after he has settle down with his new flat.
i was pretty shocked when he agreed to it.
In fact, i shd said i am VERY shocked.
he is such a 'niao' person, ever since the day i was born, or the day i get to know him, as my dad.
His stinginess can piss mi sooooooooooo much that i realli nv thot he will agree to buy a laptop for mi.
While walking bk home, i tends to think a lot in my mind.
He is the one who walk thr my chilhood life with mi, without dad, i would not have those precious childhood memory keep in my mind till today.
i always thot that he USED to dote mi alot when i was young, n always blinded myself by $ issues, assuming that he did not care for mi when i continue to grow up..as an adult.
n now, i realise i was so wrong.
It's not that he do not dote mi anymore, is becox he dun have the 'ability' to dote mi.
n mi, as his closet kin, misunderstood him for like.....mani mani yrs?
jus look at my previous blog entry n u will noe hw deep is my hatred for him at times.
n now, i wun say i felt v happie when he is buying a laptop for mi.
i would say initially i am so touch till tears, n now, i am so Guilty.
Guilty,becox i realised it too late.
How can i jus doubt his fatherly love to mi?
When he has spare cash, no matter hw niao he is, he will still try to get things for mi, as long as i request it from him.
All these yr, is not becox he doesnt wan to treat mi any better, he jus need to care for himself first, before he can care bout anyone else.
i knew it.
n now, i felt so ashamed of myself.
Misjudging my dad.
i noe hw pain it is when one day i lose him.
n i dun dare to imagine that day.
i always noe that i gota try my very best to spent quality time with him, before he left this world, but i jus didnt put in any effort in making this happen.
He is so lonely, yet he did not chose to come to mi.
It's not becox that he willing to buy mi a laptop, n dats y here i am, tryin to say nice thing about him.
i dun have to explain to anyone, for i noe hw i realli feel inside my heart towards dad.
i am famous for 'Knife Mouth, Tofu Heart'..
the fact is, everytime i scolded my dad behind him, or inside my heart..
i knew that i would nv abandon him, n he will always b my dearest daddy.
i felt realli apologetic towards him.
i think i owed him a lot, no matter is previous life or this life.
But i hope if there is realli next life,we can b father n daughter again.
Wishing on the same star @ 11:49 PM
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Desginer/Editor: 
